Understanding the "negative" emotions

A common misconception is that counselling will help you eliminate fear, anger, sadness and other "negative emotions", but that is impossible. All of these emotions are crucial for our survival and therefore cannot be removed (and it would be dangerous to do so).

In therapy the goal is to acknowledge the emotions, to understand them and why they appeared and find out what needs are these emotions are trying to communicate.

These might be:

Sadness: "I lost something very important to me" or "My expectations and needs weren't met". Sadness is a way we cope with loss and it informs us when something or someone was valuable to us.

Anger: "This isn't fair" or "Someone disrespected me or people I care about" Anger lets us know when

something or someone crossed our boundaries

and it motivates us to take action.

Fear: "I don't feel safe, this might be dangerous" or

"I don't want to let anyone down". Fear informs us

when we feel vulnerable and unsafe and it motivated us

to protect things we value.


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